It's not fair I can not climb that tree!!

"Momma, I want to go up the tree!"
"No, baby, it's too high!"
"But that boy is climbing it. He's way up there! SEE!"
"I said no" (if you know me, you know how accident prone I am, and if you know Monster, you know how he can get hurt walking.)
"But if you just put me up there, it wont be to high."
"I'm not putting you up there, monster!"
-finds my brother-in-law "UNCLE, UNCLE!! Will you put me up the tree?!"
Dookey looks at me and I shake my head no... "You're to little for right now to get up the tree. Go chase Monkey! (the niece)"
As we are going on about our business, all the adults at the party talking, and carrying on... I look over and see Monster has Monk's four wheeler against the tree and is standing on it, the limb is still too high for him to reach. A for effort though little boy... back to adult conversations  A minute later I look over and Monster now has a bucket on top of the four wheeler trying to get the limb! As soon as "BE CAREFUL" came out, he fell.

After the kissing of the boo-boo and making sure he was okay, "Do you see why mommy told you not to do that?"
"Yes, but I can do it when I'm five!"
"Alright... when you're five you can climb that tree. Uncle Dookey will help you!"

(he was happy with that answer, and went to tackle Monkey)

Last night after his football game,  he took a bath, we cleaned up his scratch on his belly from the tree, put a bandage on it, (which he took off an hour later) and snuggled to go to bed.  This morning he wanted to put medicine and a bandage on it.  We're already running late at this point and i didnt want to fight with him, so we put medicine on it, put the bandage on it, and he told me he wanted me to write on the bandage. So I did, "Monster, Mommy love Floyd!"
Get in the car, get gas, a donut, and head to school... "Hi! One day, my mommy told me not to climb the tree, and i did and i got hurt! SEE!"

Great, do I explain who Floyd is? Did they even see it? Crap, I mean, it isn't like it is their business, right? Ugh, don't say anything and just walk out of the classroom... Maybe they will ask Monster who Floyd is, and he'll say "I'm Floyd!"

Ohh, the joys of raising a boy.